When Your Gone
by I Love Bleach
Summary: "I...you didn't think of me, did you?" Oc
1. Chapter 1

Its meant to be sad and depressing. Is it hard to believe Light Yagami loved someone?

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I miss you.

A lot.

But I wont cry because that was something that you never liked.

It made you sad, can you remember?

I miss you so bad.

You gave me a look that you never gave Misa or Kiyomi.

At first it was hard to believe that you actually loved me, and not just to use me, inside I was happy.

The happiest girl alive.

I wont forget you.

What we had, the things you said.

I forgive you for breaking your promise and my heart along the way.

Your touch and the smell of your skin still lingers on mine, and it makes me crazy the fact that it will be the only memory I have of you to cherish.

Oh its so sad.

The fact that your plan did not work and that your not here anymore.

" I miss you so much" I whisper to no one in particular because no matter how hard I want to believe it, you're not there.

I hope you can hear me.

Wherever you are.

So many things I need to say.

J'ai mlle vous mon amour…

I remember it clearly.

Matsuda shot first but I don't hold a grudge against him.

In fact I thank him for doing what was right.

J'ai besoin de vous.

I need you.

So now I heard Misa committed suicide.

Sa morte etait injuste, don't you agree Light?

Ahh…your name,it burns a hole through my chest.

The day you slipped away.

Out of my grasp out of my world.

A day that will forever haunt me deep inside.

Light Yagami I miss you.

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_J'ai mlle vous mon amour= I miss you my love._

_J'ai besoin de vous= I need you._

_Sa mort etait injuste= Her death was unfair._

Its french.

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	2. Chapter 2

We both heard the bells ring very loudly that rainy afternoon.

I suggested that maybe, just maybe, someone was getting married, because I didn't want to believe that it was his death call, time to say _goodbye forever_.

The pouring rain hid the tears but of course you heard my soft whimpers and my hard breathing.

That's when you told me.

If I die_ Light Yagami_ is _Kira_.

No!

You cant die!

You cant die!

You **_wont_** die!

_But you died_.

And you were right.

You were always right.

Light didn't win.

_He lost._

**But I lost too**.

Because now I don't have your touch, your voice, your scent.

I don't have you.

And if I cant have you then I **cant** live because you are my life.

So as I stand on the edge of the building, a silver gun pointed to my temple, I think of you and I_ pull the trigger_.

And my eyes close for the last time and I think I can hear you calling out my name.

_Aishiteru L. Lawliet_

_Aishiteru_


	3. Chapter 3

Matt is my fave character but somehow it seemed harder to write..

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_**I found God on the corner of 1st and Amistad where the West was all but won...**_

Its not making me feel better.

Crying at Matt's grave isn't making me feel better.

Why did I have to let him go?!

The last thing I had said to him was that I loved him, and he had smiled, and said he would be able to die happy.

And then, just like that, he walked out of my life, leaving a huge gap in my already broken heart.

"Baka!!"

I hissed at his memory, smoking a cigarette and playing his stupid Nintendo Ds, all while assuring me that he would be fine.

Why do men lie so much, just to male us feel better, when at the end of the day we still end up with a broken heart?

But somehow in that same end, even if he broke my heart I end up loving him with all the shattered pieces.

_Matt_

Do you know how much I wish I could be able to run into your open arms like the old times?

For you to hold me and never let go.

To take in your personal scent, but...

you fed me your cigarette stained lies and look where we ended up, never to see each other again.

And I fucking hate that, the stupid feeling of hopelessness and the pitiful sound of Nears voice as he broke it down to me through a _stupid laptop! _

But you know what I fucking hate the most?

The way that I cant hate you, even after all you put me through.

Why?

Because every time I needed someone to lean on you were there wiping my tears and holding me tight as I cried.

"Stupid Baka!!"I screamed, falling to my knees and hands, breathing hard, while my vision blurs from the glossy tears threatening to fall out of my eye's.

Didnt you think of me when you counted out the flaws in you and Mello's plan?!

What was supposed to happen to me!

Did you think i would just move on like if nothing happened between us!?!?

Mail you should have known I wouldn't forget you.

How can I forget the one guy I gave my all to love.

But then again a guy is a guy...

"Fucking idiot why did you leave! I told you I loved you!!"

I hope my cries reach you wherever you are.

And if you hear me...

"I fucking love you Mail Jeeves!!!"

**_All alone smoking his last cigarette I said where have you been, he said ask anything... _**

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